Scattered thoughts

  • Adapting to change should come naturally to humans, no? Considering that we survived over so many other species because we adapted to our surroundings. Shouldn’t it be like second nature to us? But in day to day life, why is it so hard to accept change? To be comfortable with whatever changes that are going on in your life, or will go on in the near future? Especially if this change is something that is out of your comfort zone? A change like you have never witnessed before? For me, if a change means shifting to a new city, a new country or even a new job, that would be something exciting to me. Because even though it is a change, it is something I have been through before. And enjoyed it. But what about a change I have not been through before?! Howmuchever excited I might be about this change, there is this tugging at the back of my mind. What if? What if it does not go the way I imagined it to go? What if I can no longer do the things I like. S reckons I will always find a way to do the things I really like. That is true. To some extent. But it might not always be easy. He also reckoned that I might not know whether I like this change or not, unless I actually witness it. Which is also true. But still…
  • I was telling S the other day about a very bad dream I had and I woke him up in the middle of the night, scared and shivering. Very rarely I remember the dreams I have. And except for the one time (long time back when I was a kid), all the dreams are scary or unhappy dreams. This kind of freaks me out and makes me a little sad. Because, I am not an unhappy person, by nature. My mind is restless constantly, for sure. But definitely not sad. And it troubles me that I do not get any happy dreams. (I might be getting a few, but I never remember them!). And the thing is, I don’t mind having a restless mind. I actually like having multiple threads going on in my mind, analyzing things, situations, life. It is necessary for me to think (and sometimes over-think) to remain sane. And this thinking makes my mind restless, when ironically all I am trying to do is understand things. Simplify them. I was reading online that a mind not at rest get these extreme dreams. But for a change, one extreme happy dream? Pretty please?
  • Among other news, there are 2 upcoming weddings in the next few months, featuring 4 of my close friends from grad school. Both these couples fought a long (of 5+ years) and hard battle to get their families to agree and now they are finally getting married! This makes me so happy, seeing people sticking with each other through the hard times. It is never easy, waging this battle with parents to be with the person you love. Such cases kind of make me believe in love even more. And even though I will be missing their weddings, I just feel so involved in their weddings because we all meet up so often to discuss it (we stay minutes apart from each other!) and I cannot be more excited for them 🙂
  • Sometime back, I was watching Michael Palin’s travel documentary on the Himalayas. And I was struck by a major wanderlust. For days I was dreaming about going and hibernating in the mountains. It is no secret that I LOVE nature. Absolutely love the mountains. That is my favorite way to spend time – outdoors. And I wish travelling and hiking is something I am able to do throughout my life. I hope I am physically and financially able to do these two things.

And, the thoughts remain scattered…

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3 Responses to Scattered thoughts

  1. nightflier says:

    about change – I personally feel my ability to adapt or change is taking a backseat as I am growing old. And it will only reduce if I do not work at it. I still want to do all the outdoorsy adventures or some essential life changes but at times I just dont want to adapt or change, because it comes easily.
    and the himalayas are happening for us in May. yay!! 😀

  2. I think I like change. I almost seek it out. Everyone else finds that weird.

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