Hope

Being hopeful is a tricky state of mind. I have always thought that hope is a double-edged sword. Time and again, it has been said that hope is the one thing that keeps us going. It makes us desire for a better tomorrow. But then, it is such a dangerous state of mind too. Hope just increases the expectations that things will improve for the better. That things will be good. And expectations, if not met can lead to despair. And according to wiki, the opposite of hope is despair. But when expectations are not met, it is the very same hope that is leading to despair. So, despair is not always the opposite of hope.
I have been quite disturbed these past few days because of certain happenings. And these happenings involve watching the person dearest to me having very high hopes about something. And this “something” does not seem to be getting fulfilled. And every time I speak on the phone with the said person, it breaks my heart to see how hopeful that person is. (It is always so easy to deal with problems you have, as compared to dealing with the problems the people close to your heart have. And you can do nothing to ease their pain. You have very less control over their thoughts and their hope).
Believe it or not, I am not a very “hopeful” person. By that I mean, I live in a neutral state of mind for most of the times. At least, I try hard to be in a neutral state. Certain things in the past have made me believe that this is the right way to live, for me. I am not in despair. But I am not in hope as well. I do not think how tomorrow will be. I do not feel it should be good/better than today. I just deal with it the way it comes. Just do the thing you are meant to do in that situation. Maybe, it is for this reason that I find “letting go” easier. I read a quote in Calvin and Hobbes some days back which said: “lowering your expectations to the point they are already met is the best way to live” (or something to that effect. I do not recollect the verbatim version of that quote). And it made me smile.
I do not think happiness and hope are in any way related. I can be happy, even though I might not have any hopes. I can feel peaceful, light-hearted when I do not have any hope. This is tried and tested situation, so I know that at least for me, happiness (in the true sense) and hope are not related. And that does comfort me a little bit.
What does hope mean to you?

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10 Responses to Hope

  1. Snita says:

    For me..hope is another basis to look forward to… without some hope… daily in the mornin… i dont what i would wake up to.. I am hopeful about certain things.. but off late.. i am more in the negative side of things.. so for now only this much!!! πŸ™‚

  2. Pepper says:

    I agree with you all the way. I like being hopeful at times, it makes it easier to deal with the current crises when you tell yourself to lean on some positives. But those positives might never really be there, and if you try leaning on something that doesn’t exist, you will fall flat on your face.

    One thing that I haven’t fully understood is the distinction between ‘hope’ and ‘expectations’. Most people tell me to “Hope for the best but expect the worst”. How is that possible? The very fact that I am hoping for the best means a part of me is expecting the best too. I can’t hope for something without believing in the possibility of it being granted to me. The way I see, it I find it very hard to separate ‘hope’ from ‘expectations’. The statement that I quoted above will always be a mystery for me.

    • hope does makes it easier to deal with certain things, as you say, but maybe we are just postponing accepting that it might not work as well?!
      And I too think that the sentence is a contradiction. If you do expect the worse, then you are in some way not hopeful of a positive outcome,

  3. nightflier says:

    Now that you have asked it, I find it easier being hopeful for others than myself. Also it does not mean that I live in despair. I normally take the day as it comes. Living one day at a time, rather living what’s in the moment than hoping for stuff comes easier to me. That is my comfort.
    From my experience I am a pretty nervous/jittery person when I am trying to be hopeful about something πŸ˜€

  4. I think “hope” is what I use to get back on my feet. Something to help me stay positive. Something to stay motivated to move forward. Something to hold on to when nothing seems to be going my way. Without hope what would we wake up for in the morning?

    ∞ © tanvii.com ∞

    • But we do wake up even if we are feeling pessimistic, and when nothing is going our way, no? At least, for me, I wake up because I have to wake up. Not because I am hoping for something. Ah, well. I am still not sure about this hope thingy in my mind πŸ˜€

      • I didn’t mean “literally” wake up … but more figuratively. I guess if there is absolutely NO HOPE thats when a person would go into severe depression and never recover. Personally I think I have to “push” myself to stay hopeful, even if I know there is little “hope” … ‘coz I feel I am responsible for my own sanity. It will be way more easier to give in to pessimism than to keep moving forward …. and I aint a quitter. [This is more about clearing my own thoughts, than a response to your comment, I realize now, after writing. Thank you for helping me do that! :)]

  5. I love this post because my first name is Hope. =D

    http://pinkchampagnefashion.blogspot.com/

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