8.15 AM: (in office) : Just finished checking mail.
My thought bubble: I am frustrated. Superbly, royally frustrated. Pissed off. At everything and everyone around me. I come to work early in high spirits hoping to get something tested and be done with, only to find that the lab guy had done *nothing* about the service request I had put yesterday. And it is not helping that the lab is in UK and my today’s update (of telling him to budge and do it quickly) will only be seen by him tomorrow. So, effectively, whole day gone without finishing the thing I was hoping to wrap up today. This is perhaps a trivial thing, happens to everyone all the time. But it has brought tears of frustration in my eyes on this awesome sunny day. And I can feel the day and the events just spiralling downwards from this time. I can just feel it.
8.30 AM: Send a mail to the lab guy. Log into gmail to ping S and tell him my dukh bhari kahani. S is offline. Ping M (He is my college buddy who is very dear to me). A snippet of the conversation:
M: hey moti
i am frustrated
and want to vent it
M: ha ha ha
me: %@#%@! UK ka lab guy
one %#$%#$% he is (I used a word I wont print here)
M: itana kya hua re??
me: i put in a request to fix an issue i am having yesterday..
and he replied saying they don’t fix such issues
(and they are actually paid to fix ANY issue engineer might have)
and the damned machine is in UK..which means I have to wait
one WHOLE day for him to respond to my request
Almost the whole week is gone just trying to get that machine up and running
The rudest, non-responsive lab assistant EVER!!! in the history of mankind!
M: nikal gaya sab
M: now jaa kuch khhaane and peene ko leke aaa ** M is a person who thinks the solution to any problem is eating 😉 **
and just chilll
seriously…i need to learn anger management
M: yar mera simple funda hai ….
panni pita hu mast thanda
and then akele jaake chai pee leta hu
and aane ke baad mast gane sunata hu..then sab nikal jaata hai
phir bhadd main jaaye duniya and bhad main jaaye kaaam
M: aur tabhi nahi nikala to Himesh ki movie dekh leta hu
M: jo ab dekh raha hu
me: i hope mera vo stage na aye and I recover before that
9 AM: Take a cup of tea, go down and sit on a bench next to the fountain. The hot tea is feeling heaven in the chilly weather.
My thought bubble: hmm..What M said is true.. bhad me jaye kaam. Seriously, why do I get frustrated over work and such seemingly small issues (See, by now I have realised that the earth shattering issue I was talking about earlier is indeed a small issue). Work is there today, it might not be tomorrow. What is going to stay constant and affect me in the long run is how I deal with such things and people. How I deal with my own anger. How I stop myself from being angry in the first place. These issues are not going to matter in the long run. In the big picture. Or they might even matter. But at this moment there is nothing much I can do but email that person and wait for him to (hopefully) do something constructive. Hmm.. (mind blank for a while)
Actually, accepting that there is not much one can do after a particular point is just so damn hard! And just so very important to maintain a peace of mind. And important so that it does not affect the other things you do in life. hmm.. Maybe I over-reacted? hehe (this is me laughing in my mind) But don’t we all realise we over-reacted after we have reacted? I mean, wouldn’t it be better if I would have just thought all these things before I reacted and got angry?!
I think I will just write a post so that I can read it whenever such triggers make their appearance.
9.30 AM: Comes back upstairs to office and starts typing out this post 😀